Looks Can Be Deceiving

My son is huge WWE fan. I'm not sure why; I've raised him well and exposed him to great sports such as MLB, the NBA and NFL and even NASCAR. He got to travel with me on the Orlando Magic's team plane many years ago and I also took him to the NBA All-Star game in Phoenix a few weeks ago.

Wyatt starting watching WWE events on television a few years ago. I tried to explain to him that this was nothing more than dramatically staged theatre; that the outcome was decided long before the combatants entered the ring. But he was convinced that the punches were real and that the wrestlers were very strong and that's why getting hit over the head with a metal folding chair didn't do any harm.

I thought I was starting to get through to him, and then a very terrible thing happened. The WWE decided to hold Wrestlemania XXV along with WWE RAW (their weekly live TV event) right here in Houston. Wyatt begged for tickets for Wrestlemania, and my wife and I decided they would make a great Christmas present.

To make a long story as short as possible, we ended up getting him RAW tickets for his birthday (which is in early December), and made up a story that Wrestlemania was sold out. It was sold out, he just didn't realize that he was going to get those tickets a few weeks later.

As my wife and I discussed who would take Wyatt to these events, we determined that she would go with him to Wrestlemania on Sunday and he would take a friend to RAW Monday night. Wrestlemania was fun, but the seats I bought (which by the way, cost somewhere just south of a second mortgage) ended up being a little worse than they looked on the seat map. He was excited to be in the stadium with 72,000 of his closest friends, but he was disappointed that when someone got tossed out of the ring that his seats were too close to the floor to see that action live. Thank goodness for the Jumbotron.

Both Wyatt and Karen gave the event decent reviews, but I didn't hear the "Ohmygoshitwasawesome" that I had expected. My plan was working! His love affair with the WWE was about to end.

So this past Monday rolled around, and I was simply going to be the chauffeur, while Wyatt and his friend enjoyed WWE RAW. Well, his friend got sick, so guess who ended up using the second ticket.

We entered the arena just as the doors opened, and made our way to our lower bowl seats. It turned out that ole Dad did good on these tickets, as we were only about 100 feet from the corner of the ring, and high enough that we could see over the heads of the people on the floor. It was strangely quiet when we entered. No music and no lights were on other than the lights hanging above the ring.

I sat bored while we wated for the event to start. There was a pre-show that started at 7:30, which was an undercard of two bouts with wrestlers I'd never heard of. They were entertaining, but I was still wondering why I was there. As 8:00 got nearer, you could feel the energy in the Toyota Center starting to build. Right before we went live on USA Network, we were told that the main event would be a tag-team match featuring 10 WWE superstars, including John Cena, who had won the big title match the previous evening. Cena was probably only one of two or three wrestlers in the world I could pick out of a lineup, so that got me out of my seat.

8:00 came just a few seconds later, and we saw the TV opening credits on the big screen. Randy Orton came out to a deafening roar of boos from the 18,000 plus in the arena, and the drama began.

At about 8:02, I was hooked. I unashamedly became a WWE fan, and I realized why millions of people all over the world follow this "sport" so closely.

For the uninitiated, the WWE is not like wrestling of yesteryear. This is a polished machine that provides an incredible night of -dare I say it- family-friendly entertainment (ok, the scantily dressed WWE Diva's make that a stretch, but that's the only thing that stretches the bounds of decency). There was no profanity. There were no obscene gestures. There were no offensive signs (every sign is checked prior to entering the arena).

Yes, the matches are rigged, and yes, at times it can be comical to watch. But when your "guy" pins his opponent to win a match, you will be on your feet. I was. Repeatedly.

Between the early matches I wondered why I had become so mesmerized by something I had dismissed as trailer-trash fodder less than an hour before. And then it hit me.

The last letter in WWE stands for entertainment. "Wrestling" is simply the vehicle by which they provide that entertainment. What I saw was an incredibly scripted soap opera combined with blockbuster movie-grade stunt work and circus acrobatics. Villians and heroes, only their battleground is inside a 20 by 20 foot square.

Looks can be deceiving, indeed.